Can our righteousness save us?


Daily we strive to do good deeds. In our minds we think our deeds are all we need to be counted righteous. Some parade themselves as infallible, they are quick to point out their good deeds. I have heard many say God will give them more reward for the good deed they have done, the truth is, we are more evil than good. If we apply the mathematical process of cancellation in division in weighing our good deeds and evil deeds, there is a certain large proportion of evil deeds left after each good is cancelled out by an evil deed. The more we try to prove how righteous we are the more we lose focus on what Christianity is all about.
There is no pastor, no bishop, no pope, no prophet, no one is more righteous than his sins are. Tell me you did more good than evil and I will point you out as the greatest liar. God is and will always be one without sin and that is final.
HOW THEN ARE WE JUSTIFIED? Now Christ comes into the picture. Every Christian knows humans carry a death penalty on their heads, this penalty came to our first parents and through them we inherited it. Romans 10:3 “ for they being ignorant of God’s righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted themselves to the righteousness of God.”
From Eden in Genesis 4:4 God instituted a symbolic sacrifice for the remitting of sin. God planned to save every soul from the punishment of Death. But how can he succeed when we are constantly falling into sin(the wages of sin is death). Having this in mind we come to understand that for each lie told we are doomed, the question is “can the next good deed cancel the already said punishment?” maybe it can but the truth is we can’t keep track of all our sins, we sin many a times without even knowing we sinned. Even the righteous deeds we accomplish are many a times with flaws. Something was needed to be done and God did it, he chose to make the greatest sacrifice ever. The remission of sin needed one to take the punishment of sin on his shoulder alone. No man can do so since each of us commits sins every day of our lives. Someone without sin, someone more righteous must take on him the death penalty.
Christ took the punishment and his righteousness became ours. Then a question was asked, should we then continue in sin since there is already a provision for our survival? No! Christ said “if you love me keep my commandments.” What commandments? The ten commandments. I must tell you this; Christ knows it will be hard for us to keep these commandments without error, yet he wants us to try, he wants us to condition our mind and body towards keeping these commandments without erring. John said we must at each point of the day kneel in prayer for the forgiveness of our sins. Each earnest prayer brings forgiveness from God and we are immediately clothed in the righteousness of Christ, and not our own righteousness.
Romans 3:10 “it is written, there is none righteous, no, not one.” When we understand not even the pastor, bishop, priest or pope is free from sin, our own pride will fall and a new spring of awareness will flow within us. We will be forced to look towards Christ for newness of life. We will find the peace our hearts needs when we hide ourselves under his righteousness. There will be no more fear when we understand that we are living under a perfect life which is Christ. Romans 8:1 “there is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh but the Spirit.” These words are comforting, trusting in Christ and doing our best is all we need. We must not relax because Christ has done it all but must stand up and do good always. But when we fail we must remember it is not our righteousness that matters but the one whom we believe in, we must quickly go in prayer to God, once we utter the words ‘we are sorry for every sin we have committed’ and deep down we mean it “God will not see our sins but the righteousness of Christ which covers us.


Who is this Jesus? Did he live among us? These and many more questions are asked daily about this figure. I decided to research on a podium of unbias. I took my time to search all given proof that he Jesus once existed, in fact his existence is not a topic for debate. Who is this Jesus? This is a question many had sought to answer for many ages. And now I will try to answer this same question and hopefully it will sooth your longing taste for a good answer.


Had it been there is no proof of his life, it would be harder for Christians to believe in Christ. Missionary Christian works will never spring and life would either be in darkness or in the mercy of science. Human character will be vile because the base of assessment for every man, Religion or believe seems to be Christianity. Many religions seek to reconcile Christianity and their believes, they look frantically through the pages of the Bible for proof of what they Believe. You may not agree with me on this but it is the truth.
Back to Jesus, there are many Historical proofs of his existence. These proofs strain from Ancient historians to ancient documents. Tacitus, the Roman historian in his “Annals” (chapter 15, Paragraph 44), says the Christians derived their name and origin from one Christ, who in the reign of Tiberius had suffered death by the sentence of procurator, Pontius Pilate”. Another proof comes from Pliny the younger, he had this to say in his “Epistles” (X,96), he refers to Christians of Bithynia as followers of  followers of one Christ, who bind themselves with an oath not to enter into any wickedness, nor commit thefts, robberies, or commit adulteries, or falsify their word, or repudiate trusts committed to them.”
Josephus, a Jewish historian who was born a few years after the birth of Christ may not have said a word about Jesus but he noticed the works of Christ’s cousin, John the Baptist. Like many Jews of his time he feared coming out openly to approve Christ’s works.
We will not forget the Bible in itself is historical and surely will be used to proof the existence of one Jesus the Christ. The four gospels gave short expository works on Christ’s life, this works are authentic in terms of history. Only two of the writers of the Gospels are actual followers or Disciples of Christ, the other two probably heard what they wrote down from sources who knew Christ. The amazing thing here is this; even though the four gospels were written in different periods and locations they still carried one voice, the Christians believe it was the Spirit of God which caused the cohesion of the four gospels.
Luke a non-Jewish Doctor wrote his work between A.D. 50 and 60. His work is pure historical, a narration of a live and its dealings. Luke wrote in classical Jewish-Greek style adding taste and flexibility to his work. He aimed his work towards the gentiles, preferably the Greeks of his time, but his work is still fresh and very much resounding than when he wrote.
Mark the other non-disciple who wrote about Christ was a convert. It is believed he was Peter’s interpreter and once an attendant of Paul. Mark must have learned of Christ from Peter, it is believed Peter told him the stories of Jesus but not in orderly manner. It took the moving of the spirit for such writing as Mark’s to manifest, it came better than it would have been if Mark wrote without the Spirit’s help, even if Peter helped.
John and Matthew both knew Jesus in person; they sat with him, ate with him and slept beside him. You must know these two men wrote their works in different times and locations, both writing styles were inspired to suit a given audience. John is believed to have written his work long after the fall of Jerusalem and after the deaths of his fellow disciples.


We learn of Christ’s birth from what these four great writers wrote. The story of Christ’s birth is one almost everybody knows. Jesus was born during the reign of Emperor Augustus Ceaser and Cyrenus the governor of Syria. His birth still perplexed many, how can one be born without copulation? Christ defiled this natural law, this is the beginning of more perplexing facts regarding Christ. No human can undergo this impossible process, in fact his mother Mary needed comforting before swallowing the news of the pending birth. Is Jesus just a human? Can someone be born without the union of the sperm and Ovary?
We know his father Joseph saw this as an impossible one, he moved to break his engagement with Mary but was stopped by a being greater then we. 


Some say Christ was a teacher, some say Philosopher, others a prophet, and the most held believe; he was God incarnate. Now we must go to what these writers say of Christ. These four writers had either known him personally or heard of him from people who broke bread with him. They will open our eyes to what this great Icon claimed to be, they alone know best of who Jesus the Christ was.
The Muslims claim there is not a place Christ openly claimed divinity or should we say, claimed to be God’s son in the writings of this four men. What events recorded by these men presented Christ as not one of us apart from his miraculous birth? Now to the four great historical writers who devoted time in getting the biography of the greatest being to ever walk this earth on paper, what did they say Jesus the Christ is?

John in his writing, John 10:29-30 “My Father which gave them me is greater than all: and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand, I and my Father are one. The Muslims wants a specific proof of Christ claim of divinity, this passage is enough to clarify their question. Look at verse 33 of that chapter; (33) “The people to whom he spoke immediately went about to stone him for the sin of blasphemy that a mere man will claim to be God.” What proof is more clearer than this, John recorded this event to show the people clearly understood Jesus’ claim of divinity but are hardened. They refused to accept Christ’s divinity but their ears heard and their brain understood the words of Christ, hence verse 33 became important to show us what happened next.
John reported in chapter 8: 56-58 of his writing that Christ claimed to have lived before his earthly manifestation. His account clearly quoted Christ words and the immediate reaction of his listeners. “Your father Abraham rejoiced to see my day: and he saw it and was glad…… Verily, verily, I say unto you, before Abraham was, I am.” John said the people marveled, “this brat is not up to 50 years” they asked, how can father Abraham had seen his day? It was this questions which prompted Christ to make his claim more clearer, before Abraham I am. Imagine a mere man claiming to be thousands of years old, who is that old if not God.
Another thing I must not over look is the believe God’s words can never fail. It is only God who speaks and nothing, I repeat, and nothing will come between the fulfillment of those words. Jesus the Christ claimed likewise, he said his words will never fail even if Heaven and earth  passes away. Again Christ claims divinity, how can a mere man say such a thing, in fact he is supposed to be stoned for blasphemy. Or should we say he never blasphemed but is divine. Mathew couldn’t miss these words in his recordings in Mathew 24:35 “ Heavens and earth shall pass away but my words shall not pass away.
Omnipresence is the character of God, this is not an issue of debate, no man is omnipresent. Whoever doubts Christ claimed to be God when he walked this earth is simply lying to himself. Mathew didn’t miss this; Jesus doing his last days on earth sort to comfort his followers. Mathew sat among the others looking at the master’s lips, his mind wondered of. He pondered on the hardship before them, the rejection, hatred and the meanness of the Jews. He was not alone on this mind voyage, the others joined him. Jesus knew he must comfort them, he knew they needed hope so he said this words “lo, I am with you always even unto the end of the world.” Mathew must have smiled when he heard those words, he did not forget them till the day he breathed his last.
Who is without sin but God? Who has lived on this plain, tempted but yet did not sin? Is it possible to live 33 years on earth with no single lie, hatred, grudges, lust, wickedness or any other sin no matter how small? It is God who can only accomplish such task. John told of an event where Christ challenged his enemies to proof him a sinner. John 8:46 “which of convinceth me of sin? In fact he challenged them to poof he has ever sinned, remember in the event Christ claimed to be without sin. What did his enemies do? John said they moped at him, none opened his mouth to speak.
Who can forgive sin but God. No man can and will ever can forgive sin, whoever claims otherwise is a liar or he is God. Mathew 9:2 recorded another event of proof, “son be of good cheers thy sins are forgiven thee.” Jesus hid not the fact he is God incarnate but he in so many ways claimed divinity.
IS CHRIST A MAN? The best place to get a good answer is still from the men who wrote about his life in the gospel. No, Christ is not a man but a man at a certain time. This must be conflicting or should I say confusing, how can Christ be a God and also a man? Remember, in The Hebrew holy book (The Old Testament)  a decree of a messiah to come was made. I will give you the opportunity to search the scriptures yourself, read Isaiah 61:1-3, Isaiah 45:21, Isaiah 45:22, Micah 5:2. These are but few of the prophecies about Christ life that came to pass. What I want you to understand is this; these prophecies agree the messiah will be a man and also a God and a Savior. The people of old Israel looked forward to the coming of this God-man being, a messiah to free them from their burdens. The mistake they made was putting their earthly needs ahead of their heavenly needs, in their surge for freedom from Roman rule (earthly) they forget their most needed freedom from Satan’s hold.
They looked upon Christ as a man, they see nothing special about him except his miracles but in those times of amazement like the centurion overseeing Christ’s execution, they find themselves exclaiming “ this is truly the son of God. They forget to search the scripture where prophet Isaiah prophesied that Christ will be both human and divine. Isaiah 9:6 “For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given; and the government will be upon his shoulder. And his name shall be called wonderful, counselor, mighty God. The want of material gain clouded the minds of the Jews of his time they failed to digest the simple words of Isaiah, Christ though man is God’s incarnate….a mighty God.
Isaiah also knew the presence of Christ on earth simply means God is with us, Read Isaiah 7:4. Christ was called a man not only by those who were far from him but by his own apostles. Remember Isaiah in his prophesies clearly stated that Christ is God but became man on earth. Why must he become man? I seek to make this write top as concise as can be but the more I seek to stop the more I see the need to write more. I will break this issue into two, the next part will look into the Prophecies of his birth and why he became man.
The story of Christ is one I cannot capture completely, a lot is written about him and a lot of misconception of him abounds.
Watch out for the second part of this discuss. You can send your questions to



                God in Eden instituted two wonderful institutions that should be upheld by man, Marriage and the Sabbath. God gave a commission to man regarding marriage, He said “go into the world be fruitful, multiply and subdue the whole Earth. With this commission came sex, which is the only process human procreation was made possible. God not only made SEX a means of procreation but also bestowed a certain degree of pleasure to it. God wanted man to feel at eas This joy is a lesser joy God felt during and after creation of all things. God declared he found favor and satisfaction in all things he created. God felt this joy before the fall of Man.
e and also to understand always that he alone is the creator of all Man-kind. God wanted man to have a strong joy whenever he engages himself in the act of procreation.
                Sex was not given to man without conditions. Adam and Eve becoming the first married couple on Earth (a wonderful marriage God himself was the priest) earned the right to partake in this gift through marriage. We see Marriage before sex in Eden, a perfect example for us to emulate.
                Sex should not be taken casually. It is a thing of the mind, physical and spiritual states. God designed and gave this gift only to married couples, they alone has the right to enjoy this gift. Why married couples alone? What maybe the reason? Psychologically, sex affects the mind set. It destroys rather than keep in unity relationships that are not joined in marriage. The truth is no healthy relationship exists for unmarried couples once Sex is involved. Girls are always at the receiving end of the line. Guys tend to see a girl who gives in to their advances as irresponsible. They will not tell the girl since they still cherishes the unhealthy sex. The mindset is totally changed and evil slowly creeps into such minds. No wonder we can proudly say that fornication is not only a sin against God but against oneself. No girl retains any degree of pride once she gives up herself and no man will look upon such girl as responsible. This is not a lie for in our societies there are many who carry bad names because of their lifestyle. Such people lose their voice in the society and their sins are quickly pointed out when they become provocative.
                Sex was given to man as a binding glue, to bind husbands and wives more tightly. Used on the wrong surface (unmarried couples) it destroys not only our physical and mind states but also our relationship with our creator. Sex involves exchange of body fluids, this seemingly non reasonable process secures the woman into the husband. Jesus said what we view as two individuals (husband and wife) are in fact one flesh. God made it so married couple will become one from the beginning just like our first parents.
                The music and film industries have presented Sex as simple, casual and with no meaning. My friend once told me of his willingness to pay for a girl’s transportation from a far away city to my city just to have Sex with her. A few days ago before he told me this he was asking me for monetary help. Now with a small amount in his pocket he sought to disobey God with the strongest of a willing heart. He told me this without any shame, maybe he thought I will applaud him for such evil act he dimed normal. His statement is rampant within our male folks who in their selfishness forgot God will one day judge us all. Girls either knows of our selfishness or they are ignorant. Allowing a guy to have sex with you does not show he cares, in fact it shows how wicked he is. Not only did he soil your body but also caused you to transgress God’s beautiful law of love.
                Jesus wanted us to see how evil fornication is when he illustrated to his listeners a mere desiring look on a woman is in fact fornication. Why? Because Sex before marriage before God is too horrible that even the lowest in the Angelic heir achy abhors the presence of such. Satan is ever tricky and knows how horrible a wrong appreciation of sex is before God. He chose to arouse lust in men through today’s fashion in the part of ladies. Remember a lustful look is a sin, this sin many commit including you and I each day. Ladies walk half naked in the streets causing us men to lust after them. Paul said any who will cause their brother to sin will receive a greater punishment. When you chose what you where ladies be careful it does not cause your brother to lust after you. As he is deviating from Christ’s wish, you are already doomed for causing such deviation. Satan knows if he can cause the women to dress seductively not only will the men sin through lust but rape will become rampant. Many complain of rape when in fact they opened the door through their mode of dressing.
The Holy Spirit does not dwell in a heart that is filthy, He excuses himself from such heart since he is holy. Once He leaves, the ever willing Satan will instruct his falling Angels to take control of such a person, thus making it tougher for a rethink. Don’t give in to the pleasures of the flesh but be more attuned with God then and certain Satan will flee.
                The ills of Sex before marriage are huge, the guilt that heaps on one once the act is over is much, much than one who is yet to indulge in such evil will comprehend. A friend told me of how he pushed a girl he happily welcomed into his house a few minutes ago out of his house after he had sex with her. The guilt was too much” he told me. He regretted inviting the girl over to his house. At that instant a healthy friendly relationship was quashed because of misuse sex. In my mind I wondered how the girl who from all ramifications was the one that lost greatly must have felt. Imagine the extent of guilt she must have felt. Regrets and hatred must have clouded her mind.
                We are carnal and more prone to sin but God made provisions for us. He provided a way for us to learn more about Satan and his evil schemes. He also provided a way for us to learn of his love and promises. The scripture is the only way to learn effectively all that we need to resist the Devil. Not only did he make his words available to us, he also gave us a strong connection with him. A life of prayer will always maintain unshaken connection with God. Let’s ponder together! What would have happened if my friend knelt in prayer when the temptation became strong? The mere sight of a bended knee would not only cause Satan to flee but a sense of guilt would have clouded the girl, bringing her out from the mouth of Satan’s snare. He would have been a conqueror that day.
                One thing about sex outside marriage is its ability to trigger other sins. Sex outside marriage is a chain reaction sin. It always leaves its ugly mark no matter what we do to clean it. David is a perfect Example. Neglecting his role as a king was taking what should have been a pleasant evening walk on the roof f his palace. Meanwhile the host of Israel was busy fighting in battle. David as the king should have been among his men but he chose not to.  First David neglected his duty and then he was idle. An idle man is a good work place for the Devil. Many a times we find out sex outside marriage is often between idle minds. You can never be busy and at the same look towards sex. If only David was at the battlefield he would have avoided the coming temptation. Avoiding sex must first start by engaging self with work or sport whenever the body begins drifting away. Prayer and the Bible is another sure way of getting closer to God and his heavenly will.
                David saw Bathsheba who belonged to another man. Immediately the whisper of the evil one came creeping into his mind. Bathsheba naked body caused the King to keep staring at her. David forgot he was instituted by God to rule over the land of Israel. He called her into his chamber and committed adultery.
                Then came the next sin as the chain begins to unravel. David caused Uriah’s murder in other to protect his image when he found out Bathsheba was pregnant. How many of our young girls have committed abortion, killing that which they cannot create. First David committed adultery, to cover up his sin he became a murderer.
                David’s lustful look which gave him in to murder brought judgment on his head. “The sword will not depart from thy house” prophet Nathan told him. David’s episode should be a lesson to us all. Though David’s sins were forgiving he still served his punishment, this is because sexual sin is not only a sin against God but a sin against our body.
                We must learn to present our body to God a holy living sacrifice. “Don’t you know your body is the temple of God”? Create in me a new heart and renew thy Spirit within me, this should be our constant prayer. Pray always for God’s Spirit to dwell within us. we should always remember the sin of sex outside marriage is too dangerous to meddle in. it is a temptation from Satan and it can come to any. What can separate? Us from the love of God” Paul asked.
 like David’s punishment many are living with STDS though they have repented. Repenting might not take away your punishment for we transgressed our bodies also. What about the unwanted pregnancies, it is much more better we keep away from the misused of God’s gifts.
                What about the married ones who leave their spouses for another, are they among? Our illustration using David is a screen that educates the married ones, they are not exempted. Both David and Bathsheba were married. Paul said if you cannot hold thy self then marry. He strongly advocated this when educating young Timothy.
                This same friend of mine trying to justify his wrong doing said” how can I get married to a girl without first sleeping with her? How can I know she is not barren? A courtship that builds itself around sex breaks easily. Men will tell ladies to sleep with them in other to see if they are not barren. Ladies beware for Satan walketh around looking for whom to devour. God gives children. It is not of the couples but of God’s power to bless. Men are quick to convince but very slow to keep promises, take heed ladies.
                Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your father who is in heaven. How can we lead men to God when our acts point to a different road. Many say the Spirit is willing but the flesh is weak yet they forgot a life in God is stronger than the strongest rock, resisting the strongest and strangest of temptations.
                Some say for one to effectively work for God he must be single. No! For the Bible did not affirm to this. Peter was married yet he was an effective apostle. Get married to avoid a misuse of this gift. Being single does not make one more righteous than those that are married. Remember God created them man and woman.
                A life of Prayer defeats all temptations. What then will it profit you to gain wrongful pleasures and destroy your spiritual and physical life? Enjoy sex the way the creator made it, enjoy it with your husband and wife for it was ordained for you married ones. Sex should portray God’s love.


It was not good for a man to be alone, I will make him a helper, one fit for him. These were the words of our creator. The issue of marriage is one that in part disproves the theory of evolution. If Man truly evolved, and evolution happens through chance caused by physical factors at certain times, how then can we explain womanhood and its well defined features which fits manhood. The soft voice of our ladies, their caring nature, the ability to get pregnant, their tendency to care more for their children and many more are all features sought by men in a woman before marriage. This compatibility should not be found between human beings if we truly evolved, rather it is the creative mind of our creator in all beauty brought us(man and woman to be). This is the only possible way to define the wonderful compatibility between man and woman.

Marriage is God’s institution, he alone was the founder and we are made the beneficiaries. Marriage is a pleasant gift worthy of our earthly existence. He saw man’s weakness and he gave him a helper. There are times when my cousin who is twenty seven years old will come home very hungry, too hungry to enter the kitchen to cook. He usually asks me to see if there is any in my house…….”you will not go and marry” is always my reply. The role of women in marriages is not only subjected to kitchen work but for the whole growth of the family. The illustration is to show a little reason why God deemed it fit to provide a female for our first father. The story continues; sometimes I will also have nothing in the house because of my little fear for the kitchen…. And this meant both of us slept hungry or we ate bread with soft drinks (those from Nigeria will understand this type food is for people who are Kitchen shy or have no time to cook). God made the male to behave like males and the female like females. My cousin expected me to cook where as I expected him to cook. Had it been one of us had a wife, food would have not been a problem. Genesis 2:18,22-24”And the Lord God said,’ it is not good that man should be alone; I will make a helper comparable to him……then the rib the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and he brought her to the man.. Then Adam said; this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she will be called woman for she was taken out of man.’ Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
 Marriage is more than the ceremony we witness, it is more than the paper works and all the other traditions that follows marriages. The bible said the man and the woman will become one flesh, a sacred union ordained by God. It is not to be played with for it was our creator who started it in Eden, He blessed this institution and gave Adam and Eve the authority to stay in union, becoming one flesh. Mathew 19:4-6 “ And he answered them saying “have you not heard he who made them at the beginning made them male and female, ‘ and said for this reason man should leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and two shall become one flesh? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together let no man separate.” The words of Jesus echoed strong in the ears of the Pharisees and the pressing crowd, and then it pierced through the ages to our generation. Jesus repeated the words of Genesis 2 but added a stronger point to it. What God has joined together let no man put asunder, not even the husband or the wife can separate this union. Marriage is like a room with only one door and no window, once one enters the door is locked and the key destroyed. Yet the beauties the room afforded are supposed to keep the one who enters entangled in happiness until the end of his life. In fact the one inside the room will definitely not want to leave the room even when the door is opened for him. Christ instructs us to fear God through staying steadfastly in the union which the father joined, never to separate from it for it not of us to do so.
The sacredness of Marriage is written in many places in the bible. Ephesians 5:28,29 “so husbands ought to love their wives as their own body, he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it just as the Lord does the church. Husbands are instructed to give their lives for their wives just as Christ gave his life for us. The legalism of marriage is one the heavens sanctions and respects. It is Christ who looks on with a smile when we keep true to God’s union. He likens his love for us as to a husband to his wife. This is to show us how inseparable marriage is, just as we are from him. Ephesians 5:25-27, “ husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her, that he may sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word.
Husbands are the heads; their love should be unshaking, ever willing to give themselves up for their wives. The beauty of every marriage comes from a father who neither seek other women nor care less for the wife. It is the husband who through words and actions of love will direct his wife towards the course our heavenly father planned for them. As humans we are bent to make  mistakes, yet as Christ the husband of the church took it upon himself to redeem his own, husbands should also do the same, forgiving and guiding their wives.
 A husbands who understand women are weak and brings himself low to accommodate and direct her will enjoy the sweetness of Marriage.1 PeterPeter3 :7 “ you husbands must be careful of your wives, being thoughtful of their needs and honoring them as the weaker sex. Remember that you and your wives are partners in receiving God’s blessings. And if you don’t treat her as you should , your prayers will not get ready answers.” when there is disaccord in marriage there is a disconnection between the partners and God. How can a man pray for God’s favor when a part of him (the woman) is against such favor? Surely such prayer will not be answered. Can one say yes and also say no? We take marriage so lightly that we fail to see the oneness in the husband and wife. If one say no and the other says yes then they have said nothing, it is required we must agree to ourselves before we succeed.
Women are requested by God to submit to their husbands. They are the weaker vessels, made from man. Ephesians 5:22-28 “you wives submit to your husbands leardership in the same way you submit to the Lord. For a husband is in charge of his wife just as Christ is in charge of his body the church……so you wives must willingly obey  your husbands in everything just as the church obeys Christ.” First we note the comparison of obeying the husband likened to obeying God. This does not mean ordering around in the part of the husband. As we enjoy the fellowship we have in Christ, enjoying being obedient to Christ so should a wife. And the husband must cherish and love his wife (Pamper her, show her love that no other man on earth can envisage) just like Christ did to us. Obeying the husband might sound tedious to young women who are yet to marry. When there is unimaginable LOVE existing between the husband and the wife, there will be no need to obey for the wife in love will do that which pleases the husband.
Husbands that are not abusive or beat their wives prospers. Beating a woman is the weakest act a man can do. She was gotten from you and sure will be a weaker product than the original. Building obedience through regular beating of your wife will not bring the desired effect.. The Bible frowned at it. God hates it and we must likewise hate it. Colossians 3:19 “ Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.” If you are angered by your wife, God instructs you to immediately settle your misunderstanding in a more loving way. In fact your tone of voice and your manner of approaching your wife during caution can bring her to repent in tears. Point out to her how you have been trying to keep her happy. Show her the sacrifices you have been making each day for her, and if need be bring a gift to her. It sounds hard to do but if this is done in a voice of love, your wife will surely repent of her sins. Yes your grudge against her may put you off but can you be angry with yourself for a day? You are one with her and only when the body is together and well will there be joy. Ephesians 4:26 “if you are angry don’t sin by nursing your grudge, don’t let the sun go down with you  still angry.” This means you must settle every disagreement with your spouse the same day, remember the sun must not go down while we still angered.
The most heinous crime in marriage is infidelity. Marriage should be guarded strongly to avoid this sin creeping in. God distastes infidelity and it is only that which can bring a marriage to its end. (Wives, husbands be careful), for infidelity is the only reason for a man to divorce his wife. Infidelity is not only a sin but a crime for you have stolen from your neighbor his most treasured gift, a gift from God’s throne. Mathew 5:23 “ for I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife except for marital unfaithfulness causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery”. Then we must see the marriage bed a thing holy and dedicated unto God. Hebrews 13:4 “Let marriage be marriage be held in honour among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.” Marriage is God’s gift and he guards it jealously, it should be seen as a thing of honor and not to be ridiculed. The last two commandments of God are dedicated to marriage.  Exodus 20:14, 17 “you shall not commit adultery.” “you shall not covet your neighbours house; you shall not covet your neighbors wife….”
Marriage is designed by God to last for a life time. Romans 7:2 “for the woman who has a husband is bound by law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husbands dies, she is released from the law of her husband.” Till death do us apart echoes always….fear God, respect your wife, living in humility and trusting God.